Sounds like you have lots of good advise listed above.

If the job sucks, start looking around. Maybe see a contract attourney and find out the ramifications of the studio not holding up there end of the contract. Maybe they are in default and would compensate you with an advancement, or a nice get the heck out of here check. You did move out with expectations in writing !!

Cars are always taking a shit. If it is used, it most always needs repairs. If new it allways comes with payments. They probably both add up to the same $$$s at the end of the year.

I saw the picture of your real father. Looks a little like Clark Gable in the 1939 movie,
"Gone With the Wind" kind of an oxymoron. Hug Every One, GJ

AS far as the job with N goes, if he is truley unhappy then i would consider other options. Like either maybe trying to find another job elsewhere or maybe trying to find a job at a different news station where you guys are living if you don't want to have to pack up and move.
I would try to just use one car for awhile if you can that way you guys can get a much needed vacation.
When it comes to the " dad " situation, that is a hard one for me to answer because of the fact that I am adopted too. I am wanting to find my birth parents and am hoping to end up with some sort of a relationship with them. I am prepared that they could never want me to find them or too meet me but I have to try . That's a decision that you have got to make for yourself. It's completely understandable that you don't want to bring all the drama your " dad" has into your beautiful family. But maybe he has changed and really wants to make an effort to get to know you and your family. If you decide to give him a chance though, be very cautious and i would take things very slow ya know.
You will get through all this and if you ever need to talk, I always have open ears :)

I'm sorry to hear that you have so much going on in you're life right now. From everything I've read though you guys are a strong family unit and can get through anything together, as long as everyone is on the same page and the communication is open you will figure it out. Sucks that you had car trouble and can't take a well deserved vacation but as long as you are all together thats what matters. Only you can decide what to do about your biological father but whatever decision you make WILL be the right decision.

I really can't say much better than Becky did up there :) She is so wise and is my go-to person with life hands me my own shitstorm. My advice, listen to Becky :)

You WILL get through all this, I promise. ((hugs to you and your family and that cutie pie baby of yours!!!!)))

This sounds more like a shitstorm rather than a shitcake. That being said....here's my thoughts.

As far as the job goes: other than the douchey co-worker, does N like his job? Are you willing to sell your house and start the whole process all over? How long will you have to go without insurance?

The car: do you have to have the second car ready for driving at this moment? It seems as if the two of you did fine with only one car for awhile. If that's the case, then enjoy a family vacation. Make memories, and enjoy time away from all the drama.

The "dad" situation: this one is harder for me. My own daughter has been going through this for the past 14 years. In fact, she just legally changed her last name to my husband's. I think that as an adult, we've outgrown the "daddy" phases of things. Maybe he can be a friend, or maybe he is still caught in his old ways. You really don't know unless you talk to him. If he truly wants to be a part of your life and E's life, he will understand and not put any pressure on you. This one isn't easy. But bottom line, only you will know the right thing to do.

Good luck with all of this! ::hugs::

Ohhhh Talina.... On the car....that SUCKS. All I can say on that is do what you can. If I win the lotto I will totally be buying you guys a prius. : )

On the sperm donor: I have been your friend for a long time. I remember when you were working through the issues with him. You are the strong and wonderful woman you are today partly for going through that crap. You have a wonderful partner by your side and the most adorable baby ever. It is okay to let him back in your life. If I were you Id keep my guard up. But most importantly he doesnt have to come back in your life as your Dad. He can just be a friend or someone you know. He isnt your Dad. He gave that up.

I dont know...just my 2 cents. Regardless, I love you now and forever and Ill always be here for you! xoxox

Let's definitely light it on fire and find an appropriate someone's porch to put it on. Okay... I'm juvenile. But it's fun and a stress reliever to imagine it!

The job is a toughie. Two of my sons-in-law are in jobs that are OK because they pay the bills and then some, but not what either of them want to do and one of them has to deal with an especially crappy boss who has made a number of promises that he hasn't yet kept. (I know where his porch is...) They are both in industries where hiring is pretty much frozen right now so they are putting up with it.

I know nothing about news broadcasting... what are the opportunities out there?

The car, for me, is not so tough. My beloved 12 year old Caddy has had to have $2000 in repairs since March. Sort of one thing after another and it still has almost 162,000 miles on it. But, we thought the last problem was a blown head gasket... and started looking for another car while the diagnosis was being made. (It was the heater core.)

I was dismayed at the cost of decent used cars. The only reasonable sounding car we found was a new Mazda 3 for $14,000. That was a special but it would have been a much better deal than the 5 or 6 year old cars for $8-12,000 we were finding.

The thought of a car payment makes me nauseous... the thought of one for a USED car makes me go ahead and puke.

So I say fix the car and postpone the vacation. Then again, I'm assuming that having two cars means as much to you as it does for me. Frankly, my husband and I do not share well and the 5 days my car was in the shop drove me nuts even though I didn't really want (much less need) to go anywhere! I admit that I am spoiled and have had a car designated for my personal use since I was 16 years old. My car may sit in the driveway without being started for 3 weeks at a time... but the fact that it is there is a great psychological comfort to me.

A lot of my attitude about having a car may be due to my having mostly lived in somewhat rural areas where public transportation isn't even on the radar. YMMV.

Then again, I just read about research that says experiences are what makes us happy and that it's worth spending money on vacations because the memories last much longer than any material thing. So just ignore me about cars. I doubt anything I say on that subject is useful.

I think Lori has the right idea about dealing with your "real" father. Give him a chance to prove himself without getting yourself -- and especially your healthy family -- involved with him. You've got your head on straight so nobody needs to tell you that E & N are your priorities.

OTOH -- my husband (not the father of my children -- he died when they were young) has what I consider a horrible relationship with both of his children. Frankly, I'm closer to his children than he is (they were grown when we married) and it drives me bonkers that he's not more involved with them and his thoroughly delightful grandchildren. Yet, he was the one awarded custody of them in the 60s. That was almost unheard of at the time, but it was the mother who was the drug addict and drinker. She's been clean and sober for years now, but even when she was at her worst she never completely lost contact with her children.

While she's still not what I would call completely responsible, she's a much much better grandmother than she was a mother. I think it says a lot that she's still not trusted to keep her grandchildren overnight by herself. I would be horrified if my daughter did not trust me to keep her babies safe and cared for in her absence. (I have taken some grief recently for lack of discipline where a 3 year old and a permanent marker were concerned... who knew Crayola made permanent markers and why were they in the playroom in the first place????)

Bottom line: You and N are in charge. Whatever the two of you decide, rules. You guys are smart, savvy adults and E is your focusing agent. I think the two of you will decide together on the best thing for your family whether it's about a job, a car, or the role of a grandparent. (And I think the issue with your father is more about grand-parenting than parenting. It is obviously far too late for him to be a parent to you.)

sorry used wrong blog site addy in last post

I think between the car and N's job - and don't forget precious moments with E.... You really don't need the stress of trying to build a relationship with a sperm donor that made his choice 20 yrs ago. HIS CHOICE! I would not take back a single second with my dad, but he committed a life to his kids despite a "crabby" bitch wife. It is hard to break a flushing toilet life cycle - CONGRATS that you did and keep moving on with the life you made- and STAY HAPPY. love all of you

Tough call on the dad situation. I am a firm believer in second chances, sinces I have been given a few in my lifetime. Would I be on guard? OH HELL YA! At the same time, I guess since I was adopted I feel any contact with my blood line would be worth a shot. It might cloud my judgement. I understand Karen's comment, and dealing with younger kids can lead to more pain than its worth, but your an adult. If he is willing to have online/distant contact for how ever long, then see if you can build some trust that way first. If he is serious, then he won't push for anything your not ready for. If he crosses your boundries, then that is a pretty good red flag to stay away. Is he clean/sober etc? Is he just trying to relieve some guilt he has built up? Is he looking for a potential financial fix for a continuing drug/alchohol problem? Hopefully you can weed these issues out if you keep a long distance contact for awhile. I wish you luck and love in finding out !

The Job: I always told my sons that the worse thing they could do was work at a job they hate. That goes for anybody - not just my sons.

The Car: Depends on need. If you need it - fix it. You're 'right about the whole car payment thing. If you don't NEED it, take your vacation and fix it later. Or - third option - trade the thing in on a leased car. Leases are easy to get into - no money down - and you'll still have your vacation money. Yes, it's a payment - but if two cars are a necessity, then perhaps it's worth it.

The biological father. Fatherhood is more than just Biology. He's not your father - he's the sperm donor.

First, yoju and N will have to decide if looking for another job is what he wants to do right now. It could mean moving again, not having insurance for while, etc. Big scary things to think about,

Second, any way you could get by with just one car? for a few months until you can save up the $$gain? if so, take the vacation. You need it.

Third, just because someone who was a sperm donor and little else has finally decided he wants to be a part of your life, doesn't mean you have to let him. Inviting him in would be a mistake. My own daughters went through this with their so called father, and all it did was cause them more pain. I would skip that ride and tell him where to get off the bus.