N doesn’t have the best luck with bathroom ceramics. Back in the day (like before I was even blogging) we were living in this crappy 1 bedroom apartment.

We had only been dating for a few months and the apartment was mine. He lived with this creepo guy in his own apartment, the thing was N never actually stayed at his apartment. He didn’t like his creepy roommate and made an effort to never be home when the roommate was, you know so he wouldn’t have to be friends with the guy.

Anyway, N stayed at my place all the time. He was also working the graveyard shift for a well known NBC affiliate in Phoenix, back before he was on camera.

One night I was asleep, N had stayed over and was just waking up to begin getting ready for his overnight shift. Remember how I said the apartment was crappy? Well the toilet had been running nonstop and N was annoyed by this.

So he is in the bathroom with Andrew, our first cat, he loves shower and bath time. N decides that he will try his hand at fixing the running toilet issue, at like 1am.

I wake from my sleep to an aweful crashing sound and N remarks “awe f*c%”. I laid there for a moment to assess the situation but after hearing N’s remarks to himself I knew I should investigate.

I find him oozing blood in the bathroom and cursing the cat. Now I am not the best with bloody messes. Lots of blood has been known to make me pass out.

Once my brother was tromping though a junk pile, barefoot and ended up stepping on nails… four of them… two in each foot! I was babysitting at the time and he was on medication that made his blood thin.

He waddled inside to report his injuries and I was so frazzled I just stuck him in a tub full of water, to make the blood stop oozing. I then called an ambulance. I know not the brightest idea but common I was like 14.

Anyway, I am not good with tons of blood and N was loosing lots of it. I threw him a towel and told him to wrap his cut so the blood would stop spurting. I composed myself while he stopped the bleeding.

Apparently he took the toilet tank lid off and balanced it on his leg (so it was horizontal to the floor) while he was fiddling with the leaky toilet tank. The cat tried to jump on to the tank lid that was teeter tottering on N’s leg, it fell, broke and sliced N’s ankle on the way down.

It was a very deep cut, we are talking nerves and bone exposed. He was trying to say it was fine and that stitches weren’t needed. I argued with him based on the amount of blood lost and eventually had to inspect the damages.

I insisted he go to the hospital after spotting bone and nerve exposed. They stitched him up and he was very late to work. Later when the insurance claim came in the mail it indicated his “neck scalp” was repaired.?.?

Just this morning N was showering and getting ready for work when I hear another huge crash and shattering from the bathroom. I poke my head in to make sure he’s not dead on the floor or something. This time his foot is oozing blood, his neck scalp was spared by a few inches.

Turns out the ceramic towel bar just broke apart. He was yanking the towel off it too forcefully because the darn thing just broke apart and sliced him on the way down.

He’s not good with bathroom ceramics, at least his neck scalp didn’t need to be stitched back together this time though!